Christmas Countdown Day 5
Mason, whose brain cannot survive without mischief, leaned slightly—very slightly—against the sleigh control panel. He didn’t push anything. He didn’t press anything. He just… existed near it. Which triggered the Emergency Reindeer Turbo Mode system.
“The Reindeer Situation”
(in which Mason is on court-ordered timeout)
The Chaos Four met Friday morning looking like they had survived a glitter hurricane.
Peppermint was limping.
Joe was twitching.
Buttercup had frosting in her ear.
Mason had been explicitly told he was not allowed to touch, hold, look at, think about, or breathe near explosives for 72 hours.
He sulked the entire time.
Peppermint slammed her mittened hands on the table.
“Okay. No bombs. No gingerbread riots. No tunnels.
This time… we go airborne.”
Buttercup’s jaw dropped.
Joe looked horrified.
Mason whispered, “But I could help—”
Peppermint snapped her fingers.
“MASON. TIMEOUT.”
He crossed his arms, deeply offended.
The Plan That Felt Smart But Wasn’t
1. Sneak into the reindeer barn.
2. Borrow one (1) reindeer.
3. Fly over the kitchen roof.
4. Lower Peppermint through the chimney hatch like a festive delinquent.
5. Get the hot chocolate.
6. Escape before Bob finishes his emotionally-dependent ham break.
It was simple.
Classic.
Idiot-proof.
Unfortunately, the Chaos Four are not idiot-proof.
What Happened Instead
Step one: SUCCESS
The elves snuck into the barn like stealthy little Christmas ninjas.
Step two: SPECTACULAR FAILURE
Peppermint approached Comet gently.
Comet reacted like Peppermint had insulted his mother.
Peppermint flew backward into a hay pile.
Joe tried to calm Dasher with a carrot.
Dasher robbed him.
Like, pickpocketed him.
Even took his gum.
Buttercup attempted to saddle Cupid.
Cupid entered full rut.
Buttercup screamed.
Mason was told—under threat of Santa-level consequences—to “stand still and touch NOTHING.”
This made him vibrate with suppressed chaos.
The Moment Everything Went Wrong
Mason, whose brain cannot survive without mischief, leaned slightly—very slightly—against the sleigh control panel.
He didn’t push anything.
He didn’t press anything.
He just… existed near it.
Which triggered the Emergency Reindeer Turbo Mode system.
The barn doors blew open.
All nine reindeer stampeded out at Mach 3.
Sleigh sparks flew.
Peppermint grabbed a dangling rope and screamed in four octaves.
Buttercup held onto a bale of hay riding it like a rodeo champion.
Joe disappeared under a blanket.
Mason yelled, “I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING THIS TIME!”
He was correct.
And yet… chaos still happened around him.
Bob the Bulky Guard arrived with the resigned energy of a divorced dad at Chuck E. Cheese.
He stared at:
9 runaway reindeer
A traumatized sleigh
Mason (glittery and guilty)
Buttercup clinging to hay
Peppermint swinging from a rope
Joe… possibly praying
Bob sighed.
Deeply.
Anciently.
“Absolutely not.
Whatever this is… absolutely not.”
Thus:
❌ Attempt #3: FAILED
❌ No reindeer were harmed (emotionally maybe)
❌ Hot chocolate: still untasted
Mason blamed “the air.”
Peppermint blamed fate.
Joe blamed Comet.
Buttercup blamed the moon.
Morale?
Shockingly still High.
